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Friday, March 28, 2008

Let's Talk About The Law Guardian

In any custody battle, a Law Guardian is appointed for the children. He/She is the children's advocate, basically their own personal attorney, independent of both parents and their attorneys. It is the Law Guardian's job to make sure that the children's best interests are paramount throughout all court proceedings and typically should remain on the case for one year after it is settled.

Unfortunately you don't get to choose your children's Law Guardian. Although you do have the right to request a new one if you are unhappy with the one that was dealt to your children, you just never know what the next card in the deck is going to be, not to mention the fact that the court frowns upon these types of requests and may look at you as if you are just trying to be difficult. Your request very well may be denied and now you have to live with the one that you have just offended.

I chose to stick with the hand that I was dealt and basically had to do her job for her by documenting everything and just bombarding her with information that she could not ignore, although she certainly did try. I just wasn't havin' it!

This is a copy of one of the many letters that I've sent to the Law Guardian.

Regular Guy

100 Anywhere Road

Mytown, New York 12345

(999) 867-5309

January 31, 2008

VIA FAX TO: (999) 999-999

Bertha B. Sleepy, Esq.

Dead End Street

Nowhereville, New York 11111

In re: Sam, Daisey and Princess

Dear Ms. Sleepy:

I received a telephone call from Chipper at your office on 1/23/08 at approximately 9:30 am. She advised me that you were in receipt of my letter dated 1/17/08. She also advised me that Cruella was coming in that afternoon to meet with you in regard to starting overnight visits with the children. She asked me several questions about the allegations of sexual abuse that have been made against my children’s half brother Snake who lives with Cruella. I answered her questions and also gave her the telephone number to reach Investigator Columbo, who is leading this investigation. At the end of our conversation she said, “I’ll keep you posted.”

I have not heard back from your office since then, and I have left two messages. I would like to know the outcome of your meeting with Cruella as her next scheduled visitation is this weekend; and would like to bring your attention to the following:

  • On 1/23/08 Cruella came to my house for a scheduled Wednesday afternoon visit with the children. She was 15 minutes late picking them up and 15 minutes late dropping them off. (Please see attached letter to Cruella dated 1/23/08)
  • At the conclusion of said visit, my daughter Daisy informed me that they were late coming home because; “ The potatoes weren’t ready, so we had to eat meatloaf in the car on the way home and we had to stop at CVS to get Snake a magazine and I was freezing because Mommy had the window open the whole time.”
  • At therapy, the next evening the children informed both the therapist and myself that according to their mother, they are definitely sleeping over her house on their next visit and that she has been waiting to celebrate Christmas with them until they can finally sleep over. I get the same story every single time they see or talk to Cruella.
  • I have asked Cruella on more than one occasion to please forward me her new mailing address, (also part of the court order) but I get no response.
On 1/30/08 Cruella came to my house for her next scheduled Wednesday afternoon visit. She had not spoken to the children since her last visit. She arrived 10 minutes early to pick them up and brought them home 35 minutes late. My son Sam called me at 7:40 pm from Cruella’s cell phone, at which point they were already 10 minutes late, to let me know that: “Mommy forgot her purse at her house so we had to turn around because she needs gas.”

Based on these and countless other observations, I find it hard to believe that Cruella is maintaining her therapy and medications. Cruella’s personality disorder is chronic, pervasive and lifelong. You will be off this case in August of this year and it is ultimately my responsibility to make sure that when my children are with Cruella that they are in as healthy an environment as possible. You specifically told me at our last meeting on 1/14/08 that Cruella had supplied you with proof that she is in fact in regular therapy and maintaining her medications as per the court order. Therefore, I respectfully request that you forward that proof to me immediately. Thank you.

Very truly yours,

Regular Guy

I did not get any response to this for almost two weeks, so I wrote her another with just a little bit of a stronger tone.

Signed, Regular Guy


  1. Thanks for stopping by my blog for a visit.

    One thing I fear now more than anything is the introduction of a new person who can be baffled by PEW's bullshit.

    After enduring 2 custody evaluations that were complete whitewashes, and 1 custody evaluation that I thought was fair and accurate but ultimately didn't come with a recommendation for custody - I need no more "professionals" who are so easily duped or otherwise disinterested and not accountable for their recommendations.

    I don't want a GAL. I don't want a parenting coordinator. I don't want a "friend of the court." None of it.

    Unfortunately, society today doesn't put a high regard on discipline and responsibility (even in very basic forms) and when you get in front of a "new age professional" - when the tears start flowing from PEW and the unsupported accusations start flying again - She'll be termed the loving, caring person and I the "control freak."

    I need that like I need a hole in my head.

    Everyone seems to have a hand in your pocket in the Divorce Cartel these days and when they've bled you from your assets and cash - they walk away and wash their hands of it.

    It sucks.

  2. You ain't kiddin' my friend! The entire system surely does SUCK!

    Thanks for stopping by and thanks for sharing!

  3. She is so NOT on her meds by any means...I recognize that behavior ...see it routinely in my brother

  4. Even when she is taking her meds PROPERLY, they do help with the bipolar disorder but really do nothing for the BPD.

  5. One of the most important decisions in a divorce settlement is the custody of children. Each parent wants to have the children and take care of them. Usually there is some sort of trade off during weekends, weekends, etc. If you're currently going through a divorce, I recommend you reach out to the New Jersey divorce attorney to see how he can help you. It's great to have such an experienced attorney in your corner, fighting for your cause.

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